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Do Hard Things: Why We Get Resilience Wrong and the Surprising Science of Real Toughness

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This is an important book. And not just for those wanting to launch successfully into adulthood, but also for discontent twenty- and thirty-somethings who long to be catapulted into significance.” This book loses a tiny bit of steam at the end, as Magness turns to more general ideas and less specific actions. Much of this was new to me, and the mix of stories and science gave it a good mix of applicability and accessibility while making a convincing argument. The way to greater confidence is not to reassure ourselves of our own dignity; it’s to come to peace with our inevitable ridiculousness When you think of the word “tough,” who do you picture? Many people might think of a John-Wayne-type: someone who suffers silently, stoically ignores pain, and wouldn’t be caught dead talking about their feelings. But this popular image of toughness is deeply flawed. In fact, science and psychology find that stereotypically tough behaviors such as these are counterproductive to cultivating lasting resilience. It’s about time we redefined toughness! Practices of Toughness: A guide with dozens exercises to utilize to develop your inner mental muscle.

Magness has served as a consultant on mental skills development for professional sports teams, including some of the top teams in the NBA. He has also coached numerous professional athletes to the Olympics and world championship level. He has coached seven athletes to top Top-15 finishes at a World Championship, twelve athletes to births on the World Championship or Olympic teams, and guided more than twenty-five Olympic Trials Qualifiers. He helped guide Roberta Groner, a forty-one-year-old full-time nurse, to 6th place in the marathon at the 2019 World Championships. Do Hard Things was an excellent book. To be honest, I was not quite sure what to expect from this one going in. I am happy to report that it exceeded any expectations I may have had. This is my first from the author, but likely not my last...Alex and Brett capture the passion and potential of our generation perfectly in this book. In Do Hard Thingsthey encourage us to go above and beyond the status quo in everything from schoolwork to serving the poor. This is a truly unique and sorely needed book.”

Research consistently shows that tougher individuals are able to perceive stressful situations as challenges instead of threats. – Steve MagnessSteven was parched and desperate. When he tuned into his inner monologue, he heard one voice tempting him to drink more water. He knew that he wouldn’t survive if he caved to the voice that just wanted a drink. But he also knew that ignoring it would only make it grow louder. So he assigned roles to different aspects of his inner voice. The desperate crew member expressed and vented his frustration – but the stoic captain, representing Steven’s more rational voice, won out. Adam Alter, Professor of Marketing and Psychology, New York University Stern School of Business, New York Times Bestselling Author of IRRESISTIBLE and DRUNK TANK PINK Steve Magness possesses an incredible range of wisdom and knowledge about the science, psychology and practical sides of sport performance. REAL TOUGHNESS is a master class in how to develop resilience, persistence and confidence under pressure.” Again, taking the easy way out allows you to slink through life, but it could also create health issues. For instance, if you choose to buy dinner out because ‘it’s easier than making dinner at home’ you will suffer from the negative effects of eating fast food regularly. If you choose to eat at home, taking the extra time to prepare a healthy dinner, you will feel more energized, want to get up and exercise, and improve your overall health. 5. You Will Become Smarter

Steve delivers a critical message for our current age of posing and performance: real toughness is not about callous bravado, but instead about the ability to navigate difficulty with grace and an unwavering focus on what matters." So what’s the caveat? You should listen to your inner voices. Don’t ignore the negative or destructive voices in your head. That will only make them louder. But don’t just stop there. Listen to the voices that are giving you good advice and authentic support. They’re there if you let yourself hear them. Once you’re tuned into your voices and are listening to what they’re saying – instead of ignoring them in an attempt to feel tough – it’s easy to make sure the right voice is talking at the right time. Learn to respond instead of simply reacting.In the following book summary, you’ll learn how the science of toughness can help you do hard things. Individuals with exceptional levels of drive have all found an intrinsic motivation to keep pursuing their aims. It’s that sense of unchanging purpose – a purpose connected to spirituality, intellect, community, or mission – that allows them to dig deep. I’m Glennon Doyle, author of Untamed, the book that was released at the very start of the pandemic and became a lifeline for millions. I watched in awe from my home while this simple phrase from Untamed – WE CAN DO HARD THINGS – the mantra that saved my life twenty years ago, became a worldwide rally cry. Instead, he proposes a new model of resilience, which is based on four core pillars: ditch the façade, embrace reality, listen to your body, respond instead of react, and transcend discomfort. He draws from various sources of evidence, such as mindfulness, military case studies, sports psychology, neuroscience, psychology, and philosophy, to support his claims and provide practical strategies for cultivating resilience in different domains of life. I’m Glennon Doyle, author of Untamed– the book that was released at the very start of the pandemic and became a lifeline for millions. I watched in awe from my home while this simple phrase from Untamed– WE CAN DO HARD THINGS – the mantra that saved my life twenty years ago, became a worldwide rally cry.

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