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If I Can't Have You: A Compulsive, Darkly Funny Story of Heartbreak and Obsession

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The story is appalling; this book is merely competent. A young Utah wife and mother is declared missing while her hot-headed husband and two sweet sons are out on an unusual winter camping trip. To the consternation of her family, the husband refuses to cooperate with the police. Charlie and Braden, ages four and two, respectively, had been attending Debbie's day care for a year and a half, and like many women who had met the outgoing Susan, Debbie had become a confidante. Susan and her circle of friends were young, committed Mormon wives. Their children and their marriages came first. The friends had heard, because Susan told them, that Josh wouldn't give her money to buy groceries and diapers, wouldn't have sex with her, and wouldn't go to counseling. One friend joked that Josh treated his pet parrot better than his wife and sons. Susan also voiced displeasure that he was spending too many hours on the phone talking with his father, who had left the Mormon church. Steve Powell, Susan told her friends, had been inappropriate with her—disgustingly so. Susan was so open with her complaints that her friends were feeling a bit apathetic. They'd heard it all so many times. Josh finally signed a consent form authorizing a search of his van. In the vehicle they found the electric generator, blankets, a gas can, tarps, and a shovel. They also recovered a circular saw, a humidifier, at least two knives, a tripod, a newly opened box of latex gloves, and a rake, but did not disclose the existence of those items for more than three years.

West Valley City police issued a statewide attempt-to-locate bulletin so that law enforcement in other jurisdictions would be on the lookout for the Powells' 2005 light blue Chrysler Town & Country minivan. The police sent Jennifer home so they could search the house. Women do find the rape scenario attractive and appealing and exciting... women want to be raped by Robert Redford." At 5:43 P.M. Josh called Susan's phone again to say he was in the parking lot of the Wells Fargo building where she worked and asked if she needed a ride home.Before Namey shot and killed Sarah and show and paralyzed Matt he'd been no stranger to police. A few highlights of his criminal career: One thing that really disturbed me is the speculation about Namey's tattoo. I really got the impression that anyone with a tattoo would be a suspected gang member in Lasseter's eyes. Please don't get me wrong, he doesn't like tattoos? No problem. I like them. But my having a butterfly above my daughters name doesn't make me a gang member. I took issue with how this was talked about.

I honestly cannot believe that this is a debut novel. I feel as though Constance is my friend and I wanted to shake her and stop her ridiculous risk taking behaviour. But as I learnt what had happened to her, my arms reached out to hug her. I wanted to hurt the people who hurt her. I wanted to teach her the difference between love and obsession. The powerful writing takes the reader full circle from the first meeting with Constance on a train, bloodied and wearing a wedding dress, to the final heartbreaking diary entry which made my heart bleed, engrossing me in the story and some of the poignant descriptions of grief and despair I have ever read. I am so sorry that I judged Constance before I knew her story. However Samuel's sense of entitlement, self-importance and arrogance as well as his inability to see the depth of his treatment of not only Constance, but women in general, speaks volumes as to the type of man he is. Why is it that these are the men who attract the most vulnerable kind of woman? They fall for his charm, his smile, the way he makes them laugh all without seeing that he is really laughing at them not with them. He comes from a world of entitlement and privilege and is used to getting what he wants and then justifying his disgraceful actions by accusing women of being sulky and clingy who dare to mistake sexual intimacy as a relationship when all he is really after is a good time. Asked to relate the events of Sunday, a nervous Josh couldn't remember what Susan was wearing, and explained again how she had been tired and had laid down. Later she had gotten out of bed and they had hot dogs and watched The Santa Clause 2. Or maybe it was The Santa Clause 3. Braden had fallen asleep, so Josh took just Charlie sledding at a park near Whittier Elementary School, although in one version of his story both boys went sledding. When they got home, Susan was watching TV. Josh read the boys a story, then he began to clean the couch with his new Rug Doctor, a vacuum cleaning system he had spent several hundred dollars on a couple of weeks before. Indeed I was. Originally Levin’s novel was entitled An Explanation of Love - and stripped down to its barest bones, that’s just what it is - an explanation of what love is and what love isn’t. When the new doctor at the surgery where Constance works as a receptionist shows an interest in her, she thinks she is falling in love, except that what transpires between she and Samuel Stevens is anything but love.Short synopsis because really we all know from the title that this is a stalker novel. It is very much written in the style of You or Our Kind of Cruelty. Our narrator Constance has secrets and insecurities but most of all she is desperately lonely. This is the heart of the disaster that is to come. On the surface, Samuel is handsome and educated and he’s a doctor too so he must be kind, right? Wrong. He is wilfully blind, making false promises to women, pretending that he wants a relationship with them even though all he wants is casual sex. When those women call him out on his behaviour, he dismisses them as ‘nutters’. Probably one of the most chilling, tragic cases I've ever heard about, but it's not told in the most engaging way. Like many others, I followed this case compulsively when it was in the news. The book reports, in great detail, of what happened. But more than that, it functions as a reminder of other important things:

Then Josh had decided to take the boys camping. Susan didn't want to go. He'd "gotten a late start" and left after midnight. Despite the warnings of cold, snow, and ice, Josh said he, Charlie, and Braden had gone to Simpson Springs, about two hours southwest of Salt Lake City, elevation 5,100 feet. They had slept in the car, tried out a new electric generator for heat, and taken firewood with them so they could make s'mores. They made them, but without the chocolate. He'd forgotten that ingredient. Constance is working as a receptionist at a medical practice when she meets Samuel Stevens, a self-obsessed egomaniac who soon uses Constance exclusively to his own ends. To Constance, the relationship is so much more meaningful than it would otherwise be, as her current circumstances have left her vulnerable and raw. So begins an obsession that will lead Constance into the darkest recesses of human emotion. When asked why he hadn't answered his cell phone during the day, Josh said he had kept it off to preserve the battery. He said he didn't have a cell charger. Plus they were out in the desert where there was no service. Detective Maxwell, a solidly built man with a dark crew cut, mustache, and ruddy complexion, had fifteen years on the force but this would be the most complicated and trying case of his career. Maxwell leaned through the window of the minivan and saw one phone on the center consul plugged into a charger. He also noted a second cell phone—later determined to be Susan's—in the van. Josh didn't have an answer as to why his wife's phone was in the car. A #1 New York Times bestselling author, Olsen has written ten nonfiction books, ten novels, and contributed a short story to a collection edited by Lee Child.

It’s the story of Constance Little, a tough cookie who appears thoroughly self-centred and unlikeable. When Dr Samuel Stevens joins the surgery where she works she becomes obsessed with him; he’s everything she wants in a man and it looks like he feels the same. This is a debut! But you would never know. The writing is flawless - some stunning sentences that showed an intelligent side to Constance that she was not credited for by her peers. Debbie Caldwell pulled up in her Ford Club Wagon—the one with fifteen seats to carry all the children who attended her day care—and observed how quiet her friend and neighbor Susan's house seemed. It was 9:00 A.M. on Monday, December 7, 2009, and West Valley City, a suburb of Salt Lake City, was in the middle of a three-day winter storm. Freezing temperatures and four inches of new snowfall made the roads so icy that the local news described the streets as "mayhem." She stayed up for hours, reliving the vivid scene over and over and wondering what her brother had done to his wife.

Why the local police detectives weren't all over him like bees on honey from the get-go should be a dereliction of duty. My favourite character would have to be the irascible Edward. And his inscription in the copy of "Wuthering Heights" he gave to Constance for her birthday brought tears to my eyes...My thanks to NetGalley and to the publishers, PanMacmillan for a copy of the ARC in return for an honest review. I’m writing this review just before I start the book, why would I want to do this ? One important factor that I feel is sadly forgotten in so many true crime books by so many authors ... not everyone knows the facts ! The dry humor was refreshing and softens the tough battle Constance is dealing with . The ending is rather abrupt and could have been more elaborated .

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